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A cook and a nanny There an interesting post here by babycenter sara mcginniswhich features a link to j lo twins.The photos show j lo and marc anthony in designer couture, smiling in adoration at their newborns.J lo has the hair, skin and clothes of a goddess.Marc anthony looks like his only job is to stare lovingly at the fruit of his loins.Clearly, in their photo shopped post partum world, yukky smells, tired eyes and dirty houses don exist. A lot of commenters are sickened by the unrealistic images the new parents are portraying.As for me, i say who gives a hoot?If i could have a maid, a cook and a nanny, i take it also. There something to be said for reverse discrimination in my opinion.Just because people have money, does not mean that they are snobby.Yes, with cash comes some mixed up priorities, but not always.I can only speak for myself.When i first had kids, i couldn afford a maid.I was on a tight budget.I shopped very sparingly.Sometimes i wanted more luxuries, but i was happy.It was what it was.Some of my friends had more than me, some didn my husband got his big promotion, and i started working, the first thing i did was hire a maidtwice a month.It turned out to be, hands down, the best thing i have ever done for myself.I don defend my decision, nor do i feel like i or am teaching my kids that you can buy your way into a perfect house.I can afford it now, and i feel i deserve it.Also, knowing that i have someone helping me out every two weeks, i can get over some minor irritations in the house because back up support is coming. If i could have a cook i take it!It would give me more time to read with my kids.And eat more healthy.It doesn mean i wouldn enjoy cooking with them, or even make them clean up right alongside the cook, buti take some help if i could. Same with a nanny.I might not ever leave the house if she were here, but it would sure be nice to have someone run a bath with one child while i play blocks with another.Or run to the coffee shop while the kids are sleeping, knowing there another watchful eye in the home. If i had all this help, would i somehow be less of a mother?Not in the slightest.I know who i am, and i don need to be super martyr mother and scream to the world that i better than other people because do it all myself do you think?Would you take extra help if you could afford it?And if you can afford it, do you ever feel guilty?If you can afford it, do you feel deprived?Or, even if you could get all the help in the world, would you not do it because you think real mothers should do it all themselves? I love to hear.And j lo, if you reading, congratulations.Your place looks nice.Let do a playdate soon!If you want to come to my place, that cool, too.Just come on a friday after the maid has been here. Photo courtesy of people magazine, courtesy of sara mcginnis link from her blog Share on facebookclick to share on twitterclick to share on pinterestclick to email this to a friendcomments(20) Lol martyr mother a lot of those around here!I so agree with you on all your points.I too recently hired a twice a month cleaner, it surprisingly affordable, and why not have the help if you can?And if i could afford the cook and nanny, i probably would go for it.I don understand how that equates to being less of a mother somehow.This is the only time in history where the mother is unrealistically expected to do and be everything with minimal help.You know the saying takes a village to raise a child there a reason for that! Eh, j lo has the kids she been dreaming for years about, and i couldn be happier for her.I would be more concerned with marc anthony skipping along behind the pram in the pink cardigan. As for the maid situation, before baby, we had a cleaner twice a month.After baby, we miss the cleaner every other week when we have to make time to mop the floors and such. As for the cook situation, it would be nice to put someone else in charge of making healthy meals for my daughter and i could actually sit down with her at the table and eat together instead of standing in the kitchen putting together a slapdash meal(Turkey slices count as protein, fish crackers as carbs, need to hunt down the veggie and fruit)While she sits wailing in the high chair starving and shouting since daddy was stuck in traffic and couldn get home in time to start the dinner. Nanny?No way!A nanny would only get paid for doing nothing since i really do enjoy playing with my daughter and even changing the not so nice diapers. I doubt any of us would quickly turn down help with the domestic drudgery that too often eclipses the tastier moments of life, whether they are with our kids, our partners, or(Ooh my)All alone. But i was freaked out by those j lo pictures before i ever read the blog about them.I picked up the magazine in the supermarket and i felt sick to my stomach.How many people readers can afford any help at all? It might be nice to have a housecleaner come once in a while.But that doesn mean there is anything right about showing poor cheap ralph lauren and middle class moms an over the top, insane, unrealistic lifestyle.I thought i might see those babies surrounded by cute receiving blankets and colorful toys, but they are surrounded by silver platters and ridiculous luxury accouterments.The doting parents are there, as they should be, but the context makes it seem hollow and weird. I think the clearly fake images are a representation of everything that is wrong with this country.We ralph lauren sale UK buy what we can afford, from the first time homeowner to the shadow banking hedge fund manager.And our stars sell it back to us, fake and sad as can be. Well, i away from my family and my husband is at work all day so some help would be nice.Especially, someone to help me clean.I mean, half the time, i cant even pee without my son crying!What bothered me about jennifer pics is that they seem soo fake.She not the only celebrity to have pics taken and she not the richest.We dont know what happens behind the scenes, she probably just wants the best for them.I just hope she knows what really matters or she miss out on real memories with her children There a antoinette aspect to the jlo pix that i find really off putting.Why does she need to be photographed in a $25, 000 couture gown while feeding a newborn?Do we really need to see the $2, 000 silver rattles laid out ostentatiously in front of her?I agree with the poster who said that the babies seemed more like props in some bizarro motherhood fantasy than real children.Who cares if she has extra help?That not the issue for me.It the wasteful and pointless display of wealth at a time when millions of people are losing their homes, living in poverty, and going hungry at night.She entitled to be rich and i wish i were rich, too.However, how many babies could have been fed today with those ridiculously expensive baby rattles? I have found the wealthier children to often be more discipline than the poorer children.For the first few years of our marriage, we lived in a low income area.It was shocking the children who were out all hours of the night.Even when a child was caught vandalizing or harrassing someone or stealing, the parents were often self righteous and didn care.We also saw children often being given everything and anything they want.I saw very few limits being put on most children.We moved to a more middle income area after that.There we found a mix of kids being raised with moderation, and children being given excess, but i really rarely saw the spoiling and lack of discipline going on there that i saw in the low income area. Btw, these articles about wealthy people in expensive clothes with expensive things are not forced on us.If you read those articles(Which i have not)Then you clicked on a link or picked up a magazine.You can tell by the cover what is in it. We live in a wealthier area now.I keep waiting for my children to want to know why so n so has such n such and they don these are children in families with far less means than ours.Their parents and grandparents shower the children with so many material things and so little discipline.But my children never ask.I guess this is because my children have not been raised with a sense of entitlement.That princess entitlement upbringing only hurts children in the long run. I think if you can afford any help at all and you want cheap ralph Lauren polos it, then go for it. Personally, i about to have my third baby.Unlike my other two babies, this time around both my husband and i are entitled to receive paid maternity / paternity leave me for 12 weeks and him for 14 weeks.We are definitely taking it(Consecutively)And because we are not losing a great deal of income for six months we are keeping the nanny for the duration.This means that not only does the nanny keep her job, we get 4 hours of help every day(We usually have her for two 10 hour days a week, but she happy to stretch her 20 hrs a week over 5 days). To me, this is the difference between what will hopefully be a relaxed and enjoyable maternity leave and really feeling as if i struggling with three young children by myself. As for j lo and other celebrities, although i agree with some of the comments above, what the point in feeling envious?We know celebs lead unrealistic lifestyles;We know we never have the money to match them honestly, so what?It will never diminish the love i feel for my children, and i certainly don feel like i giving them a worse start in life because they don have sterling silver rattles. What wrong with a photo shot that resembles a motherhood fairytale?The magazine is for entertainment anyway.Do we really want to see her in a spit up stained sweatsuit?I would love a fun, if unrealistic photo shoot of my family.It would make me laugh for years to come. As far as help, i agree that if you want to and can afford it, go for it.Whether its time away for yourself for a coffee and a good book once a week or getting the house cleaned so you don have to worry what your child just ate off the floor and still enjoy a trip to the park.
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